“So, how is your sex life?” This question is often avoided by certain groups of people with serious conditions, including those with rheumatoid arthritis (RA). If you are one of them, don’t worry. According to the Arthritis Foundation, an estimated 1.3 million people in the United States have RA, so you are not alone.
You are doing fine, after all, there are many support groups within reach to help you cope with your situation. But when it comes to sex, you may feel alone and unwanted, or even frustrated for not being man enough down there in the bedroom. So, you curse your RA for ruining your sex life, when in fact, there are many things you can do about it that you haven’t discovered yet. Thanks to this article, your prayers are finally answered.
Here are some tips on how to have great sex, despite fatigue and pain in your joints.
This is the first and most important step when dealing with RA and sex. Generally, men or women with this type of condition will avoid sex with their partners instead of talking and doing something about it.
If you really want to have sex and actually enjoy it, despite joint pains, then don’t commit this mistake – unless you want to create a permanent scar in your relationship so go ahead and bottle up those feelings like a ten year old.
Of course, it will be difficult to start that conversation. In fact, anything sex-related is difficult to talk about at first but once you opened up, everything else will fall into place. You don’t expect the issue to just magically go away, do you? Hence, show her who’s the man, and open up. Having a conversation about this will let you know where you both stand. Plus, it will even make her feel more loved and trusted, because you opened up yourself to her.
And believe it or not, you might find yourself back in bed again because you get to experiment on how to have sex on a whole different level, thanks to your honesty, of course.
Aside from family vacations, sex is something you also have to plan for with RA. You’re not 18 anymore, so you just can’t rush into sex anytime you want to.
You are also years older, so you can’t do it anytime of the day. Remember, you have limitations and the pain, stiffness and fatigue you’re feeling can hinder you from having some action.
If you want more sex, plan ahead. Plan to make love at a certain time of the day when you feel good and in the mood. Make sure to time your medications, so it will be at the peak of effectiveness when you and your partner are doing it. At the same time, adjust your activities in such a way that you’re not too tired or stressed out before the actual sexy time itself. Limit your activities, but not to the point of not doing anything.
If it helps, take a nap. Did you know that having a quick snooze can give your stamina a boost? Just make sure to switch on the alarm or else, you’ll end up having an angry, naked girl, or not, waiting for you in bed.
No, you can’t be on top most of the time, since you may not hold that position for very long. And there are certain positions that may be more uncomfortable than pleasurable for you.
If that is the case, take out your book of sex positions that has been sitting in your cabinet for years and browse through positions that you think you can handle.
This is why it is important to have that conversation. This way, your partner can help you choose certain positions that are best for you without putting too much pressure on your aching joints. If you can’t do missionary for more than a minute, ask your partner to go on top or try the side by side. The options are endless, so don’t just limit yourself with the usual ones.
By being creative, you get to explore different possibilities with your lover, and eventually improve your level and times of intimacy.
Aside from certain positions, experimenting on how to be intimate with someone is also something you can do to have a great sex.
Here’s the thing – men and sex can be predictable for women. They already know the drill – kiss on the lips, kiss on her breast, kiss down there then humping for finale. Don’t be like those men.
First, you may not be able to sustain the humping part for too long, so you have to look for ways on how to last longer in bed. What’s the best way to do this? Focus on each other, of course.
Keep in mind that sex isn’t just about releasing your juices – it’s about touching, feeling, stroking and lots of kissing. Focus on her other erogenous zones, and not just her breasts and butt. Be open about including sex toys in your session. Or if you’re too tired of the usual bedroom setting, try doing it in a different location.
The key is to be creative in expanding your sexual repertoire. Try out different things first before saying no. You’ll never know how and what it feels like unless you give it a try. Plus, being creative can improve your intimacy levels, too.
So, you’ve got rheumatoid arthritis. So what? For sure your partner knows about that already.
And for sure, your partner has been affected with that as well, since you probably refuse to have sex with them – and it’s not that you don’t want to. Hence, what else is there to hide, right?
Therefore, the bedroom has no room for some mystery or guessing game. When you are suffering from RA, you need to be honest about what is comfortable, versus what is painful during sex.
It can be through your actions, words or even moans. The point is to let her know. This way, you and her both will be able to adjust certain positions to make sex more pleasurable.
And this is not applicable during the act itself. If you have been opening up to your partner, which is highly recommended, you can develop your own language, too, especially when you’re in the mood for some sexy time. Sure, planning ahead counts but that doesn’t mean you have to say goodbye to spontaneous sex all the time. Going back to tip number four, be creative.
Who says warming up is only for exercise or before you go on stage for a performance? Apparently, warming up, both literally and figuratively speaking, before the actual sex itself can make sex go from good to great.
For starters, having a warm shower or bath together is a great way to start it. Did you know that having warm showers can ease joint stiffness? Include this in your must-do list to enhance sex.
Add some aromatic body wash in the shower to bring you both in the mood. You can also take turns in giving each other a gentle massage and make this part of your lovemaking.
You get to relax and at the same time, ease stiffness and pain. Talk about hitting two birds in one stone, right?
Here’s the truth that you have to accept by now: confidence is sexy. Even if you are not blessed in the looks and abs department, being confident about yourself can still up your sexiness factor. After all, women like it when men are at ease with themselves without being over the top.
Even if you are in a relationship, still being confident about yourself makes a lot of difference. Sure, rheumatoid arthritis can bring your confidence level on the ground, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t anything about it.
Yes, your partner loves you for who you are, RA included, but are you that willing to just throw everything away because you feel so cursed for having this type of condition?
And please, don’t be such a chicken on this one. Rheumatoid arthritis may be a lifelong condition, but it’s something you can learn to deal with; hence, this is where tip number one comes in – always, always, always talk to your partner. This way, you can figure out ways to deal with RA and together, do something in order to still have great sex despite having RA.
ProSolution can also be your partner in this quest. This all-natural male enhancement pill has helped many men deal with the usual problems in sex, such as weak erections, low sex drive and even poor stamina in bed. By taking ProSolution, you get to experience bigger, harder and longer-lasting erections, multiple orgasms, increased sex drive, and even impressive stamina in bed.
Who says having rheumatoid arthritis means the death of your sex life too? Take note of these seven tips and you can surely be active in the sex department once again. Good luck, and have fun in bed.